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To be with someone or not, it's my life!

Wednesday, December 08, 2010
Hm, I've been all alone, just with myself as a partner for one and half year. I found myself in the corner of loneliness.

A dream to be with someone, always be just a dream. The person I want to be with is always standing there. Laughing, deeply. Saying a lot, without voice. His heart said, he also feel the same.

Do I ready to start again?

It's still holiday, you still have a bunch of times to prepare, my mind said.

Do I ready to chase him again?

It's tiring and seems useless. Like he won't watch me standing here. But bring me joy and happy feeling when I can see he laughing and smiling.

Do I ready to let it go my freedom?

It's sound challenging and full of adventure. But maybe I won't hugging anyone soon.

Do I ready?

For what?
To be with someone?
Or to be with someone I didn't love? they're all over me.

Said love me, want to be with me, but I don't think they are know me better than another part of myself.
Said love me, ready to make me happy, but actually just want to fulfill their own satisfaction.
Said love me, ready to make me smiling everyday, but what they've done just made me more angry every single day.

Then I found myself again. To the last and I get to know myself better. I'm not ready yet.

I love him soo much, but I'm in love with myself better. If its the right way to be with him someday, and just let it be come for the right time. Its not just good story, but will be my happy ending story.

I believe it something. He will be mine if it the destiny. He's my good friend, that was happening now.

To be with someone or not, that's my life.
To be with him or not, its my life. I always had a crush on him thou... :-)
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